Saturday, December 26, 2009

Bazinga!

This poem was inspired by the character, Sheldon Cooper, from the sitcom The Big Bang Theory. This expression was used by him in one of the 3rd season episodes and it's been stuck in my head ever since. This is a sort of tribute to him....I give you "Bazinga!"



"Goodbye, cruel world!", cried the man, "So long and Adieu.

My life has been a nightmare; and it's all thanks to you!

I feel so melancholy, frustrated and whatsmore,

You all bring me down further, each time you me ignore!"

"So thanks to you all, here I am ready for sweet release

It's my extreme forlorn attempt to find some inner peace.

I'll jump off this water tank and that'll be that;

The next and final sound you'll hear from me will be a loud "SPLAT"!"

Panic and pandemonium spread like wildfire all about

People were screaming, yelling, imploring, "Please come down", they all did shout.

"We're sorry for what we've done! We apologize and sincerely you beseech;

Never in a million years will we ever you disregard". (Apparently Hyperbole was a popular figure of speech)

But then, just as the women and children broke down and began to cry,

"Bazinga!", hollered the man, "I don't plan to die!"

As the crowd looked on startled, the man offered to explain,

"It was all just a practical joke to drive you all insane!"

"Booya!", declared the man, "I sure had you sons of bachelors there";

Oblivious to the furious eyes below and their incinerating stare.

"The Master of practical jokes! Upon myself this title I do bestow."

"The very brilliant", observed the man, "The brightest mind here, don't you know."

And just as he prepared to take his grand finale bow,

Several strong hands seized him and tossed him off the tank straight down below.

"Help! Help!", he bellowed, as he groped for something to break his fall.

Slim pickins though. He crashed and that was all.

So here's the lesson, dear readers, from the ol' ATH school,

Use "Bazinga!" wisely, it can be a very lethal tool.

A poorly timed "Bazinga!" can result in death, as you see;

By the way, "Bazinga", good folks! The man on the water tank was me!

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